Bad day...

Can I just vent for a minute??? Can we just forget that I'm a nice calm mommy for a minute while I freak out?????  Ok.. thanks!

Ok... here's the story.. so Tim is not my daughters real dad.. he's step dad.  Anyways, Kylie's dad is a complete idiot... I left him about 4 years ago... he is an alcoholic and abusive (to me.. hasn't ever touched my daughter)  Anyways, we have a divorce decree... but we're STILL going to court.  I have full custody.. physical and legal... he's constantly trying to get that changed.  I moved to another house.. and when I did, I changed daycares... well he took me to court because I did that...because apparently the daycare I chose..although it is like 100 times better than the old one is too far away from his house... who's taking her to daycare every morning???  ME!  Not him... so why the heck would it matter???

Well anyways...so he apparently has a girlfriend who lives in Cali and he went to see her.... just up an left... he's been there for about a month now.... he hasn't called.. nothing.. we have no clue when he is coming back.  I can't believe he would just leave and forget about his daughter!!! She misses him!

So I let her go with his parents because there was some family birthday party. They kept her overnight, and when they brought her back they kept her up until 11:30 at night, and then woke her up at 6 AM....umm... do we know what bedtime is??  The kid needs her sleep!!

And on top of all of that.. they didn't give her a nap...filled her up on sugar and sent her home to have a MAJOR meltdown...

So she went to preschool the next day, and they said it was like her evil twin was there... she was out of control..hitting...throwing things and just being downright nasty.... they thought I had her on some type of medication or something....

Honestly.. and he thinks I"m the unfit parent???  He leaves his daughter for over a month with no contact!!!  It was so sad.. the other day she asked me why daddy didn't say goodbye to her before he left...there were so many things that I wanted to say at that point.. but I settled with.. I don't know...why don't you ask him when he gets back.  Shouldn't he be the one that owns up to his daughter on why he left her??

I try not to talk crap about her dad in front of her... as much as I hate his guts...he's still her dad.  She'll find out soon enough that her dad is a piece of crap and make her own decision.  I haven't even gotten child support in almost 6 months now....

.I know a lot of it is control issues.. he thinks that if he keeps dragging out this court thing that he still has control over me.  He uses our daughter against me.. he's threatened to call child services because my husband and myself discipline her....if I put her in her room for time out and she cries... I'm locking her in her room and it's abusive.. really?? Since when is a time out abusive???

There are no rules at his house, my daughter does whatever she wants, and they cave in to her every whine.. and then when she comes home she's constantly throwing fits because she comes back to a house full of rules and discipline....

What am I supposed to do?? I hate seeing her in the state of mind that she is in when she gets back from being with her dad.. she's all out of whack.... I wish there was a way that I could stop him from hurting her all the time...I've never actually hated a person in my life... but I definitely hate him.. and I can't help it!!!

Does he just not care about her??? It's his own flesh and blood.. he should!   I just don't understand how he can not call or say good bye or something.. I"ll be saying goodbye for like 20 minutes until someone pulls me away... I'll be calling every day just to hear her sweet voice.  When she goes to his house for his weekend.. I can't stand it.. Yeah it's nice to have a break but I can't wait until she comes home!   I don't understand how he can leave for a month and not miss her.. not call.. and not even stop to think.. oh maybe my daughter misses me.. I think I'll call her.   As a mother I have an instinct to want to kill anything and everything that hurts my daughter or makes her cry.. except I can't do that because it's her dad...there's no reasoning with him either.. he's worse than a 2 year old... Some people really shouldn't be able to have kids.   

Ok.. I think I might feel a little better now....thanks for listening!!